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He's Got Bone Spurs that Jingle-Jangle-Jingle.... He's Got Bone Spurs that Jingle-Jangle-Jingle....
by Leah Sellers
2020-01-17 07:43:52
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In an UnReality-Reality Dark vortex somewhere within the Climate Changing Universe.........

“Well, King Trumpty, what do the Polls have to say about your ImPeaching Dumpty on General Soleimani ?” The Aide asked.

“What a Reality T.V. Score ! What a Hit !” King Trumpty trumpeted.

“Boom ! The Drones drone by and General Soleimani and some other Middle East dignitaries are Gone ! Burnt toast and crispy-fried toe jam !”

trum01_400_01“What a Blast that is ! A few Words from my frothing lips and Boom ! The ImPeachment Blues are Dis-tracted and Pro-tracted into the Iranian Rhumba !”

“Now, who’s got the Beat with the Heat ?! Me, that’s who ! Hee-hee, King Trumpty sniggered with glee.

“Ah-oooo ! Oh, my sore feet ! My NonExistent-Existent Bone Spurs are really acting up - or is that acting out ? Anyways, whatever, my NonExistent-Existent Bone Spurs are killin’ me !” Ah-oooo !”

“Should I call the Doctor, sir ?”

“No ! I gotta’ appear to be just Peachy….uh, just not ImPeachy. The Real News - I thoroughly enjoy undermining by calling them The Fake News will be all over me like flypaper ! No !” King Trumpty repeated as he rubbed his NonExistent-Existent aching Bone Spurs.

“Hey ! Did you see my Tweet to the Iranian People tellin’ them that I supported their Protests in the streets against their Leaders and their Government, and tellin’ them that the World was Watching what was going on over there right now ?”

“Now, that was a great Transactional Sales Pitch, if ever there was one ! That Pitch should get the heat off of me after my Assassination of General Soleimani and his Buddies, that turned the Iranians and Iraqis against me, until the Iranians made that huge mis-take of murdering all of those People on that Ukrainian Plane with one of Putin’s Missiles ! Now, that’s Coincidental Symbolism at its best ! And it got me out of a Hornet’s Nest ! Ha !"

“Now, the Iranian People are angry and marching in the streets all over again, but at their Leaders, and their Government, and we want to keep everyone’s Attention there and away from Me and My murder of General Soleimani at the Iraqi Baghdad Airport. Who cares if he was there legally as an official guest ?!”

“Boy, did that make our Allies and Iraq mad ! Something about Me walking all over their Sovereignty, and some folks sayin’ how would I like if they did that over my property at Mired-in-Sludgo ?! I’ll show them what My Sovereignty is all about !”

“But, sir, there’s more. Some are asking why you didn’t Tweet Out support to the Protesters in Hong Kong when they needed our Faithful Support for their diminishing Democracy. Some are asking why the Iranians, and not the Chinese of Hong Kong striving to hang onto their Democracy.”

“Let “em ask all they want ! The Iranian Tweet is a great Transactional Sales Pitch ! It’s not about what is
Real ! It’s about the Sales Pitch ! It’s about the Transactional Moment and saying or doing anything you have to in order to see your way through it, and Win it ! It’s about looking like a Winner, you idiot !”

“Because of My Sanctions, that are really hurting the Iranian People, and so therefore beginning to hurt their Leaders, the Iranians have no Real Financial Power. China, on the other hand does !”

“I’m a Deal Maker. Not an Idealist. I’m the Transactional Man !”

“Supporting the Iranians helps me. Supporting Hong Kong’s Chinese Democracy against their Leader does not !”

“What about the Protesters in Lebanon ? Any words of Support for them, sir ?”

“Who ?”

“Ummm, but are you not afraid of suffering any Imminent Consequences for your Decisions, sir ?”

“What is it with this Word Imminent ?! I am sick to death with hearing that Word ! It’s been nothin’ but trouble for Me ! Geez ! And who cares about my telling everyone that General Soleimani wanted to hit four
embassies ?! I’ll make it eight embassies if I want to, because I am the Transactional King !”

“And as for Consequences ! Who cares ?! I’ve never paid a Consequence any day of my Life !”

“Ah-ooo ! My NonExistent-Existent Bone Spurs are really barkin’ at me ! They’re howling ! Ah-ooo!”

“You want to know what Real Power is ? It’s telling a Drone Pilot to kill someone who can take America’s Mind-Meld off of my ImPeachment ! Now, that’s Power ! That‘s what it is to be a Negotiator of Reality”

“Ah-ooo ! My NonExistent-Existent Bone Spurs are absolutely driving me out of my mind !”

“No ! Redact that, and everything else I just told you ! I’m declaring Executive Privilege over it all ! Even over you !”

“Bring me a bucket of ice, would ya’ ? I gotta’ get these barkin’ Dogs under control !”

“And I don’t think that it is too much to ask for me to want an UnReality-Reality from my humiliating, Brand ruining ImPeachment !”

“I want Mitch to Pitch a Dismissal of my ImPeachment ! Just like my NonExistent-Existent Bone Spurs here ! No matter how many times I try to Cover them Up in my socks and shoes - no matter how many times I try to Dis-miss them - they just keep on Barkin’ and Howlin’ at me !”

“Are there Drones for Bone Spurs ?”

“For NonExistent-Existent Bone Spurs, sir ?”

“Are you tryin’ to get smart with me ? Huh ?! I’ll Fire you so fast your head will spin ! Just ask anyone in my decimated Cabinet or who has ever worked with me closely ! Just ask ‘em !”

“Boom ! One Word from me and you’re out’a here ! Just like General Soleimani and his crispy fried Pals !”

“No sir, I enjoy the Power and Financial Perks of my position. I Choose to be a Toady.”

“I thought so ! Alright then, go find me that bucket of ice I asked for earlier. My NonExistent-Existent Bone Spurs have actually become a problem of great Imminence ! Now, where was Imminence when I really needed it before ?!”

“Go on ! Get a move on ! I’ve got NonExistent-Existent Bone Spurs that are jingle-jangle-jinglin’, and I am Not riding very merrily along !”

“Ribbit ! I mean, sir, yes sir, King Trumpty !” The Aide said as he clicked his heels together, and bowed exaggeratedly, before leaving the room.

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