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Cave Man Grunt and Cave Woman Gimme
by Leah Sellers
2018-10-06 10:09:52
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“Ugh ! Cave Man Grunt want Cave Woman Gimme in Cave.”

“Not now, Honey. I’m busy poundin’ wheat into meal to make our Bread.”

“Ugh ! Cave Man Grunt want Cave Woman Gimme in Cave, now.”

“Grunt, please, Honey. The Bread needs to get done. Why don’t you go find Young Toot and the Cave Boys, and roust us all up a nice Brontosaurus or Triceratops, and I’ll rip up one of my Dino Stews for supper to go along with this Bread.”

cave01_400“Ugh ! Cave Man Grunt have needs. In Cave Now, Cave Woman Gimme.”

“Grunt, this is not the time. Let’s do it after all of the work gets done, alright, Hon.”

“Ugh ! Ugh ! Ugh !” Grunt grunted loudly as he clubbed the ground with his big Dino-Club.

“Grunt, I hate it when you behave this way, and that behavior won’t get me into the Cave or rollin’ around in the animal skins any faster.”

Cave Woman Gimme continued, “Let’s get our chores done first, and then we can both relax and enjoy a nice, comfortable evening by the Cave Fire.”

“Besides, Hon, you need to use all of that pent up Energy of yours on some unsuspectin’ Bronto or Tricera somewhere.” Cave Woman Gimme cajoled.

“Now, please, Grunt, you and Toot and the Cave Boys go Hunt while I Gather the rest of this raw wheat, and beat it into Bread Meal.”

Cave Man Grunt groaned and grumbled, “Me hate, Me, Too Cave Woman’s Movement. Grunt needs He, Too Cave Man’s Movement. Then Grunt get needs met on Command when he want, where he want and how he want.”

Cave Woman Gimme stopped pounding the wheat, and laid her Grinding Stone aside. She rose slowly, brushing the wheat chaff from her Saber-toothed Tiger skins and calmly said, “Grunt, you Cave Men already have it better than most. You pretty much make up all the Rules, and Lord It Around everywhere you decide to thump and bump your hairy chests.”

“I’m tired of havin’ to say No to you, Grunt, and havin’ you not Hear Me. I’m gonna’ visit some new friends of mine in a nearby Tribe. You, and Toot, and the rest of the Cave Boys can rustle up your own supper. I’m runnin’ on over to spend a little time with the Amazons for awhile.”

“Ugh !” Cave Man Grunt thumped his Dino-Club angrily on the ground and thumped his chest in protest, “Me, too !” he bawled.

Cave Woman Gimme laughed ironically, “Well, maybe, Grunt, but not tonight. You’re too full of He, Too. And this Cave Woman has had quite enough of being Victimized by Victimizers who wanna’ turn around and say they’re the ones bein’ Victimized by the Victims they Victimized in the first place !”

“Ugh ! Cave Man Grunt no understand ! Grunt need to have needs met,
now ! This is very Taxing on, Grunt !”

“Well, Me, Too, Grunt, and you never pay your Taxes ! So, now, on top of everything else I’m bein’ Taxed by a Cave Man who has never paid his Taxes ! When will it stop ?!”

“Grunt, give me that Dino-Club, I have enough Taxed-up Energy boilin’ up in me to take down a Wooly Mammoth or a T-Rex, and drag it to the Cave all by MySelf for supper !”

“Ugh ! Grunt make Bread.”

“Just don’t burn the Cave down before I get back, and we’ll call it even. And Grunt, the Victimized Taxed Woman Cometh, Hon !”

Cave Woman Gimme stalked hurriedly away from the Cave, Dino-Thumper swinging to-and-fro in her sturdy and capable Hands mumbling under her breath, “If the Mammoth or T-Rex are scarce I wonder if Grunt and the Cave Boys would settle for a thumped and Chopped Salad ?”

“Oh well, a Walk in the Woods is just what the Shaman ordered,” Cave Woman Gimme said to HerSelf as she headed into the noisy Jungle.


Check Leah Seller's EBOOK
A Young Boy/Man's Rage, and A Knife He Wanted to Be a Gun
You can download it for FREE HERE!

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